A note about language: The language used to describe ethical non-monogamy continues to evolve, and not everyone uses these terms in the same way. These definitions explain how ENMP generally uses these terms in our research and publications. We respect how individuals choose to describe their own relationships and experiences.

Anchor Partner

A significant, stable partner who serves as an important emotional or practical presence without necessarily implying formal hierarchy.

Boundary

A limit an individual establishes around their own participation, behavior, or well-being within a relationship.

Comet Partner

A partner who is seen relatively infrequently, often because of distance, schedules, or circumstance, but with whom someone maintains a meaningful connection when their paths come together.

Compersion

Positive feelings someone may experience in response to a partner's happiness or enjoyment with another person.

Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM)

An umbrella term for non-monogamous relationships in which everyone involved has knowledge of and consents to the arrangement. Often used interchangeably with ethical non-monogamy, particularly in research.

De-escalation

An intentional change that reduces certain aspects of a relationship, such as time together, entanglement, commitment, or shared responsibilities, without necessarily ending the relationship.

Descriptive Hierarchy

A hierarchy that develops because of practical circumstances such as shared finances, marriage, cohabitation, children, or the length of a relationship rather than rules that automatically give one relationship authority over another.

Disclosure

Sharing information about other relationships, partners, dates, sexual activity, or relationship developments according to established agreements.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell (DADT)

An arrangement in which partners agree that outside relationships or encounters may occur but information about them is intentionally limited or not shared.

Dyad

A relationship or interaction involving two people.

Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM)

An umbrella term for relationship structures in which people may have more than one romantic, sexual, or intimate relationship with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.

Garden Party Polyamory

A style of polyamory in which metamours may not have close relationships with one another but are comfortable interacting occasionally at birthdays, celebrations, social gatherings, or other shared events.

Hinge

A person who has separate relationships with two or more people who are not themselves romantically involved with one another.

Hierarchical Non-Monogamy

A relationship structure in which some relationships are explicitly given greater priority, decision-making authority, or commitments than others.

Jealousy

An emotional response that may involve fear, insecurity, comparison, loss, or concern about a valued relationship.

Kitchen Table Polyamory (KTP)

An approach to polyamory in which partners and metamours are comfortable having friendly or familiar relationships with one another and may socialize together.

Metamour

The partner of your partner with whom you are not yourself romantically or sexually involved.

Mono-Poly Relationship

A relationship in which one person identifies with or practices monogamy while another practices polyamory or non-monogamy, with the knowledge and agreement of those involved.

Nesting Partner

A partner with whom someone shares a home or significant domestic responsibilities.

New Relationship Energy (NRE)

The heightened excitement, attraction, attention, and emotional intensity that can occur during the early stages of a relationship.

Non-Hierarchical Non-Monogamy

An approach that seeks to avoid predetermined rankings between relationships, although individual relationships may still differ in commitment, time, responsibilities, and significance.

One Penis Policy (OPP)

A relationship rule in which a person is permitted to have multiple partners but sexual relationships involving other people with penises are restricted or prohibited. The term is generally used critically in ENM discussions.

Open Relationship

A relationship in which partners agree that one or both may have sexual, romantic, or intimate connections with other people.

Parallel Polyamory

An approach in which a person's different partners have limited interaction with one another or maintain largely separate relationships and social lives.

Polycule

The network of people connected through polyamorous or non-monogamous relationships.

Polyamory

A form of non-monogamy that allows for multiple romantic or emotionally intimate relationships with the knowledge and consent of those involved.

Polysaturation

The point at which someone feels they have reached their available capacity for maintaining additional relationships given their time, energy, emotional resources, and other responsibilities.

Prescriptive Hierarchy

A relationship structure in which rules or agreements intentionally establish the priority, privileges, or authority of one relationship over others.

Primary Partner

A partner who is given greater priority or responsibility within a hierarchical relationship structure.

Quad

A relationship configuration involving four people who are connected through some combination of romantic or intimate relationships.

Relationship Agreement

An understanding between partners about expectations, boundaries, behaviors, communication, or other aspects of their relationship.

Relationship Anarchy

An approach to relationships that challenges predetermined rules and traditional relationship hierarchies, allowing relationships to develop according to the needs and agreements of the people involved.

Rule

A requirement intended to govern or restrict another person's behavior within a relationship agreement.

Safer Sex Agreement

Agreements about sexual health practices, testing, barrier use, disclosure, and risk management involving multiple partners.

Secondary Partner

A partner who has a relationship with someone who maintains another relationship that is considered primary.

Solo Polyamory

An approach to polyamory in which someone maintains multiple relationships while generally prioritizing personal autonomy rather than building their life around a primary or nesting partnership.

Swinging

A form of consensual non-monogamy generally centered on sexual experiences with people outside an established relationship, often experienced together as a couple.

Transition Point

A meaningful change in a relationship or relationship structure, such as opening a relationship, adding a new partner, changing agreements, beginning cohabitation, ending a relationship, or changing the level of commitment between partners.

ENMP note: Transition Point is a term ENMP uses within its research framework and is not necessarily standardized terminology within the broader ENM community.

Triad

A relationship configuration involving three people in which each person may have a romantic or intimate relationship with the other two.

Veto Power

An agreement that allows one partner to require another partner to end or significantly change a relationship with someone else.